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Here are ten fun and unique ways to go on a date with your spouse
Do you take time to date your spouse? Let’s be real, if you don’t have children, every night and weekend can be a date! Seriously! Back in the day when it was just my husband and me, many people would ask us if we were having regular ‘date nights.’ We would almost always look at each other, knowing we were thinking the exact same thing. That was that every time we go out and do something together is a date. And we do that multiple times each week. We would politely smile and say that we date often.
Friends, post-marital date nights are NOT for those who don’t have children. The concept behind ‘Date Your Spouse’ does not really apply until you have children, at which point it becomes imperative. Let me explain.
Post-marital date nights are for parents! It is not until you become a parent that you begin to understand the value of the phrase, “date your spouse”. Once you become a parent, it is important to date your spouse. It will become increasingly important to find romance and chemistry on those dates. The reason? First, and most obvious is that having a child, especially a young child, makes it very difficult to get out. No longer can a couple just be spontaneous and go out whenever they want. The second reason is that once a couple starts having children, much of their energy and time, and even conversations is taken up with ‘child-related’ issues. It is very difficult to get away and simply focus on some others things not related to the kids.
To find romance and chemistry in your dates, a walk down memory lane to rediscover those things you loved to do together before you were married with children will be helpful. Check out my own personal list of things below. But first…
Trash the Typical Dinner & Movie
How often do you go on a date that involves dinner and a movie? Not to say that dinner and a movie is a bore. However, it is all too common and often lacks the spark of romance. And even more so when dinner involves, ahem, the spouse excusing himself for a “so-called” bathroom break to go play a game on his phone for fifteen minutes, all while leaving his wife to wait with the hot food that becomes cold by the time he returns. (Not that this scenario has EVER happened to ME)!!!
But in all seriousness, dates should be about the things that brought the two of you together way, way back in the beginning. Remember when you still had ‘butterflies’ over the other. Dates should be fun. They should remind you both why you love each other, and they should bring about smiles and laughs. Dates should make you want to take pictures so you can look back at the memories you made on the date. They should be an event that you don’t want to end (even though you have to end it because you have a babysitter at your house who is clocking the minutes until you get home).
Let me ask you – who of you can honestly tell me that dinner and a movie fulfills each of these things?
Think Back to ‘Butterflies.’ Get Creative. Make a List
Below are ten of my best date ideas, based on our interests. While these may not appeal to you so much, the idea is to get creative and again, think back to what drew the two of you together in the beginning.
What things did you enjoy doing together before you had children (when you could be spontaneous and free). Be encouraged to make your own list of your ten best dates. Think outside the boring box (dinner and a movie). And think outside the date “night” box (do a date day or date morning).
Also, please realize as you begin thinking about fun dates for the two of you, your list will evolve and change over time, because we as humans evolve and change. Our interests, desires, and pleasures change with time. So be flexible, date your spouse, and have fun! Now I will reveal my own personal favorite dates.
Check out this Valentine’s Day Blog
Our Top TEN Best ‘Date your Spouse’ Ideas
Number 1: Comedy Club
This was our first date night after we had our son. Our son was six months old and some friends offered to babysit for us that night. The date only lasted an hour since the baby would not take a bottle, but was hungry. Nevertheless, it was so fun for us to get out and have some great laughs, even if just for an hour.
Number 2: Take a Walk or Ride a Bike
In the early days and through those rough toddler years, this might be the only good option. It is a quick date, but still allows you precious time with your spouse. You can walk/ride to a particular place relatively close to home. Park your bikes, sit, chat face to face, and maybe cuddle for a bit before heading home.
Number 3: Hike Together
We started going on date hikes when our son was two. We take him on hikes often. However, they could never be too difficult or strenuous, especially once he started getting beyond 30 pounds. Date hikes are a great way to get out into nature and do some more strenuous hiking with your spouse.
Number 4: Beach & Boats
We have canoes that also have sails on them. Before we had our son, we took them out on the water frequently. We would find a remote, quiet beach that we could canoe/sail to and then hang out. These dates involved lots of beach time and swim time before sailing back. It occurred to us last summer that we can once again make that a fun daytime date. If you have paddleboards, or any other on-the-water toys, you can give this option a try.
Number 5: Virtual Reality
I recently took my husband out to a new place in town. A modern-day arcade filled with nothing but virtual reality bays. The game world becomes your world and your world is in the game. We spent an hour playing games that were fun, exhausting, and mentally challenging. Together we improved at the game, and conquered, sort of. It was a lot of fun and I am sure we will be doing that again soon.
Number 6: Amusement-Style Games
Miniature Golf, Bowling, Laser Tag! These seem lame because they have been around so long and we have all done them many times before. They are still fun and offer a good time with lots of laughs.
Number 7: Museums
A wonderful option if one or both of you loves museums and you have a little one who doesn’t have the patience or the self-discipline, (yet) to not touch anything and everything. Nobody said dates have to be in the evenings. Go out during the day and explore a museum of interest.
Number 8: Brunch
Brunch is by far my favorite time to eat out. So naturally, it is the perfect date opportunity for me and my husband. Our very first date, in fact, was a brunch that turned into lunch, (we were there so long).
Number 9: Swimming Hole
Before we had our son, we had a few different swimming holes we enjoyed going to during the hot summer days. With a toddler who is only just beginning to understand swimming, it has been difficult getting out to any of them. Last summer, we asked our babysitter to come in the morning. We got to drive to the trailhead, hike out to one of our favorite swimming holes, and spend a few hours there. Admittedly, this is a little longer of date and therefore may cost a bit more babysitting dollars. However, if you pack your lunch and snacks instead of eating out, it will even itself out anyway. Plus, you get to do something you don’t often get to do anymore.
Number 10: Ice Skating
Every year around December or January my husband and I go ice skating in the afternoon. We love it. We get to talk, hold hands, skate and sing to the music and enjoy the fresh cool air.